Re-thinking kids entertainment…

In the name of God, most Gracious, most Merciful.

As part of my house husband duties over the last 6 weeks, I had to keep my boy entertained while I worked through my to-do list in the office. Unfortunately  the TV is a great distraction so when I needed time to get some serious work done, I would be happy for him to keep himself occupied watching some of the kids tv shows that play through the day. We have been mindful of the types of programs he watches but when you’re busy and occupied yourself, it’s not easy to regulate what he watches.

Just today I was getting some work done in the lounge and I heard something very peculiar on one of the kids channels. This ice man character was trying to convince this fire-ish mummyfied looking creature not to harm the little kids so he began offering him bribes, this was on of them… “here’s a pair of night vision x-ray goggles for when you have a lady friend over”.

My kid’s 2 and half and I know he didn’t get it but what the hell is this sort of content doing on a kids show… on the ABC? I’m a big fan of mature humour and wit in certain animated features but as a father, I can not accept adult or sexual humour on a kids show. Not to mention the fact that the mummyfied creature represented a being that was created from fire and at one point during the show attempted to possess the little kid. This is not children’s entertainment.

If you have young kids and you’re happy with them spending hours watching tv everyday, you should seriously stay home and watch with them one day. You will be disgusted at what they are exposed to and what passes as entertainment these days. I’ve been home for the last 6 weeks and I am not comfortable any more.

I don’t agree with the TV being used as a tool of distraction in the first place but I will admit, it works and sometimes that’s what you need. I think it’s important to know and understand the tv shows they do watch and it’s our responsibility as parents to protect them from anything that might not be appropriate for them.

I didn’t think I’d have to do this for a 2 and a half-year old and I’m afraid of what he might be exposed to as he grows up. Some of the older kids/teenage shows are very disturbing and unlike toddlers, there aren’t too many alternatives. For now I’ll stick to Play School, Sesame Street and our collection of Zaky videos. I’m looking for more Islamic kids entertainment as well which will be helpful with Ramadhaan around the corner.

Wife’s done this week InshaAllah so I’m hoping that with the 2 of us at home, we can find a viable alternative to the TV. Bearing in mind that kids will always do what they see their parents doing, we might need to make some changes first.

 

 

Thinking about Ramadhaan…

In the name of God, most Gracious, most Merciful.

With the sighting of the new crescent, Ramadhaan is only a few weeks away. I remember the 100 day countdown on a few Facebook pages but it still felt like a distant event. It’s not too far off now so everyone’s talking about it, thinking about it and hopefully planning for it. Ramadhaan is a huge date stamp on the Muslim calendar and though we all complain that it arrives and departs very quickly, Ramadhaan memories usually last a long time.

Despite living by the gregorian calendar, there is something special about the month of Ramadhaan which makes it’s memories very vivid. Every year, the rituals and obligations remain the same but circumstances always change so your approach to Ramadhaan and the lessons learnt keep changing. Once we reach Sha’ban each year, the Islamic calendar becomes a major part of our lives and once Ramadhaan arrives, you couldn’t care less about what month of the year it is. It’s as if, the year pauses briefly to allow for this special month and then resumes when it ends.

Last Ramadhaan was a challenging time for me and my family. I had recently left work and moved back to Brisbane when my dad took ill and everything became slightly blurry for a few months. Ramadhaan arrived and unfortunately, due to the stress, pressure and unexpected commitments I had, I wasn’t able to maximise the Ramadhaan experience. I’ve found that emotional experiences during or around the month of Ramadhaan are not easy to forget.

Reflecting on these memories makes me extremely grateful for the events that have unfolded since then and I thank God for helping us get through it.

This year, InshaAllah (God willing) will be my first Ramadhaan since I left work last year without any unexpected or unplanned commitments. I am hoping to make the best of it and hopefully even make up for last year. When I was working in public practise, I remember fantasizing about what it would be like if I didn’t have to work during Ramadhaan… This time I get to test it out. I’m hoping that by remembering and reflecting on this, I can stay focused and maximise the Ramadhaan experience this year.

The Ramadhaan anticipation has struck earlier this year so I’d like to start planning earlier too. Hoping to write and reflect a little more InshaAllah.

 

اَللّهُمَّ بَارِكْ لَنَا فِى رَجَبَ وَ شَعْبَانَ وَ بَلِّغْنَا رَمَضَان

 

‘Allaahumma baarik lanaa fee Rajab wa Sha,baan wa ballignaa Ramadhaan.’

 

“O Allah, make the months of Rajab and Sha’ban blessed for us, and let us reach the month of Ramadan (i.e. prolong our life up to Ramadan, so that we may benefit from its merits and blessings).

 

Islamic College Fete…

In the name of God, most Gracious, most Merciful.

I attended the annual Fete at the Islamic College of Brisbane this weekend for my weekend dose of Halal-ness and inspiration. Due to an ever-growing Muslim population virtually everywhere in the world, our functions and gatherings always come with traffic congestions, parking issues and crowd control problems which we’ve grown accustomed to. Despite the massive turnout yesterday, I was impressed at the orderly manner in which we, as a community conducted ourselves. While I can’t comment on the success of the fund-raising initiative, from a social perspective, it was a success.

Despite the anti-Muslim media frenzy over the paste decade, the broader community have learnt the secrets of our gatherings and functions… The FOOD! It’s always a pleasure to see Muslims and Non-muslims coming together to celebrate and enjoy the many diversities our cultures have to offer. A true sense of community, family and brotherhood was on display which is a real display of what we, as Muslim’s mean when we claim that Islam means peace.

Nothing is more Peaceful than a group of Muslims from all over the world, living in a Western Land, coming together to raise funds for the growth of an Islamic School. The organisation of the event has been improving each year, the school itself has grown at an amazing rate over the last 5 years which is a positive sign for the Muslim community in this area. Support came from the muslim community, non-Muslim community as well as local government representatives and officials who understand the major role the Muslim community plays in the area.

There is distinct benefit in promoting and facilitating a single, united Ummah or community, particularly when residing as minorities in Western countries. The unity, discipline and strength displayed when the community stands and works together is precisely what we need amidst the global onslaught on our Religion.

Events that are hosted, supported or held at Islamic institutions have a special significance in promoting a true impression of both Islam and Muslims in the context of social integration. When you have Muslims from a range of ethnicities including so many reverts, Islam becomes more than just a brown religion. When people of different races, cultures and ethnicities unite for the sake of faith, it makes it easier for the broader community to understand and accept that Islam is not a brown religion, not an Arab religion but a world religion. This display of unity can dispel arguments that question our ability to work together and integrate with the rest of society.

The social, yet Islamic environment also displays the simplicity of our faith and the ease with which our religious obligations can be met alongside our social and personal lives. It doesn’t take much for a gathering to be Islamic, it usually starts with a prayer or recitation, music is kept to minimum if any, entertainment is usually provided by kids in the form of song or art and when the time of prayer arrives, Muslims answer it by getting together in a designated place and praying together which usually takes no more than 5 minutes. Thereafter, the eating, drinking and socialising resumes. As Muslims, this is something we take for granted but for a non-Muslim observer, this informal display of our religion can make a massive difference to their views and perspective on what is portrayed to be a strict and heavily regulated set of restrictions.

I believe our functions should remain Islamic at the core as a point of difference rather than simply being events organised by Muslims. The Fete was truly Islamic and provided a platform for social interaction, religious integrations and most of all… the best Da’wah or propagation of Islam which is through action and behaviour rather than simply words.

The Islamic College of Brisbane is very special to me and I hope one day, to send my kids there too. I pray that Allah grant them success and protect their reputation. As Muslims, it is OUR responsibility to support OUR institutions.

Sunday afternoon Halal-ness…

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

A blue, rainy Sunday at home got me feeling for some Hot Thai food and some coffee. Decided to go to Madinah Cafe which is down the road from the house. Hadn’t been there in months and to be honest, I wasn’t sure if they were still open. Halal restaurants come and go so I would not have been surprised if they had shut shop. Alhamdulillah they were open for business and lunch was awesome. Enjoyed my coffee and my cashew chicken but aside from the food, the Halal environment and peaceful atmosphere is what’s truly fulfilling.

Madinah Cafe doesn’t just serve Halal food, it provides an environment conducive to Halal dining and socializing. Cafe style dining with Arabic Caligraphy, Islamic paintings, artwork and little reminders about Allah on the wall coupled with friendly service from a humble and polite muslim family makes it more than just another halal cafe.

From the outside it probably looked like just another ethnic restaurant with noisy people and kids running around but on the inside it was a casual, peaceful place with Muslims from diverse communities coming together to enjoy Arab, Western and Asian food. Alhamdulillah, MashaAllah, InshaAllah, SubhanAllah, is what you hear around you and no one walks in or walks by without saying Salaam. It’s the little things that make the difference between simply serving Halal food and providing Halal dining.

When you are surrounded by goodness and God-consciousness, you feel more inclined towards saying and doing righteous things. It can turn a lazy Sunday lunch into something more virtuous and fulfilling. Instead of simply going out for lunch with your wife, you can spend on your family for the sake of Allah and enjoy a more satisfying experience. While waiting for our lunch, surrounded by  all the ‘Halal-ness”, I was reminded of this Hadith:

“When a man spends on his family, hoping for reward, that is (counted as) an act of charity for him.”
   (Bukhari & Muslim)

A beautiful hadith I would not have thought about if it was simply any Sunday afternoon lunch. On the micro level, this is what a Halal environment can do for you…

It doesn’t take much to create a good, Halal environment but it’s definitely worth it. Get more from your outings and gatherings, keep it Halal.

 

New Routine… Part 2

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Almost 4 weeks into the second instalment of my wife’s practical experience program and 2 weeks left of my househusband duties. Despite my reluctance the first time around, it’s become second nature now with 10 weeks under my belt. To be honest, I am going to miss it when it’s over.

After successfully implementing a toddler friendly work routine I was able to work more productively and even found time to earn some brownie points by cooking dinner and taking care of the groceries. I can’t remember the last time I worked so efficiently and productively, I really hope I can maintain it going forward.

When you work smart and focus hard, you can achieve certain efficiencies but that’s not the end goal, the goal is to work smart enough to get what you need done and allow yourself time to unwind and do ‘other’ things. When the day’s work is done and the day is not over, that’s when you start having fun.

My office has been transformed into an awesome little playground, there are toy cars parked everywhere, a fuel station under my desk and car stickers on my filing cabinets… it’s awesome. We watched movies, played games, went shopping, cooked lunch and had some very interesting conversations. Became quite the pro at carting the kid everywhere I went, even managed my meetings and met all deadlines.

The best of my accomplishments though, was strengthening my spirituality and reviving old good habits. The last 4 weeks have allowed me to maximise my time and take advantage of so many things I’ve neglected and have been striving to achieve since my job description changed last year. Frequenting the mosque, setting aside time everyday to recite Quran, studying the meaning of the Quran and countless hours listening to inspirational speakers from across the globe has helped me find contentment in my productivity and a sense of peace.

My routine will change again soon Insha Allah but I’m hoping to continue on this path. If I was able to achieve so much with my current schedule, I must do even better with wife’s help during the day.

Insha Allah (God Willing)…

Time for a little travel…

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Decided to take few days off and travel with my wife and son. It’s been a busy few weeks and sometimes you need a little rejuvenation before getting stuck in to routine again. Planning to visit one of my favourite cities in one of my favourite countries… Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia.

With a last-minute booking and our flight in 3 days I have lots to do before I can really take a break but it’s exciting. Looking forward to taking my wife out and enjoying some quality time with my son. Becoming more interesting as he gets older so we’ve a few cool places to visit with him.

Whenever I think about travelling, I like to do it for more than just globe-trotting. This time, I’d like to give myself and my wife a break from routine, some quality time together in the same place we spent our honeymoon together. This time a little honeymoon with our 2 year old son. I find peace in travelling to Muslim country, particularly one with such an emphasis on the preservation of Islam and Islamic Literature. We’ve been to Malaysia on numerous occasions and we can’t get enough. Looking forward to the Muslim experience, the Halal food, audible call to prayer, praying in the beautiful Mosques, in the airport and in the shopping malls too. The perfect balance between holiday, leisure, family and faith…

A verse comes to mind:

Say, (O Muhammad), “Travel through the land and observe how He began creation. Then Allah will produce the final creation. Indeed Allah , over all things, is competent.” [Qur’an: Chapter 29, Verse 20]

…4 years married!

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

What a way to start the year… my son turned 2 on the 1st of January and the 2nd was our 4th wedding anniversary. I guess the fact that we have a 2-year-old son forces us to believe that we’ve been married for more than 2 years but it definitely doesn’t feel that way. It really feels like it was just the other day. So much has happened, so much has changed in these 4 years but there’s 1 thing that hasn’t… our marriage. Four year’s later and despite occasionally taking things for granted and being a bit cranky, I still feel like I did then. Grey hairs have sprouted and body weight has fluctuated but inside, I still feel for my wife what I felt that day 4 years ago.

With each day comes greater challenges and bigger responsibilities but the realisation that our marriage stands so strong 4 years on is soothing and certainly reassuring. Marriage is so easily taken for granted and it’s so easy to neglect the person we wake up beside each morning, I’m thankful for these reminders that often wake you up to the many blessings you have around you.

I’d like to use this milestone to change a few old habits and make sure that my wife and our marriage are both given as much attention as they should and a little bit more. Love, affection and romance are not reserved for newly weds or special occasions and should be celebrated everyday. If I fail or come short for some reason, I hope this post will remind me and keep me on track.

The Prophet Muhammad (S.A.W) said: “The believer with the most complete faith is the one with the best character, and the best of them are those who treat their wives the best.”

… Insha Allah!

2012 closing…

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

 

Alhamdulillah, I am grateful for seeing the end of another year. Every day is a blessing from Allah whether you live by the Lunar or Gregorian Calendar or whether you ‘celebrate’ New Years or not.

After a few hectic weeks, we took a few days off to spend some family time together and celebrate our son’s 2nd birthday as well as our 4th wedding anniversary. These dates or milestones really put things into perspective and are sometimes good reminders about the things we take for granted. I could not believe my son was already 2 and the next day I couldn’t fathom being married for such a long time. The change in routine was good and gave me an opportunity to reflect on 2 of the most important people in my life. Some may call it celebration but I like to think of it as an appreciation for my son who just turned 2 and my wife who’s been with me for the last 4 years. I probably feel the same way every year but I can not believe how fast 2012 went by.

2012 was a big year, lots happened, so much changed and with the change came a few big challenges. My sister got married and moved to America, I quit my job in public practise, began working as a virtual business consultant and finally kicked-ff my online supplement business. Circumstances changed drastically with my dad’s illness and I guess things haven’t quite gotten back to normal since then. I haven’t yet had the strength to write about some of the things I learnt and felt during this challenging time but perhaps I might, Insha Allah.

With so much uncertainty and so much going on at home, time just flew by I’m glad I was able to stop and take a break for a few days to appreciate the blessings in my life. There are many things I wish I had done, so much that was done and as always a few regrets. My aim is to do the things I wish I had done, appreciate the things I did accomplish and work on reducing the regrets Insha Allah.

2012 closes, our holiday was the perfect transition into the new year and now… 2013! Alhamdulillah!

 

 

 

My little boy is 2…

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

My little boy turns 2 at midnight tonight. It’s been an amazing 2 years but I can’t believe he’s grown so fast. I can still remember the day he was born and as I flick through the photos I have on my phone, I can’t fathom how time has passed and how much he’s grown. I remember the emotion I felt the day he was born and every so often he would do something that would reignite those emotions within me. Reflecting on the last 2 years has given me those jitters again tonight and I am so proud of him. I’m so grateful to Allah for blessing us with such a bundle of joy and allowing him to grow and develop the way he has over the last 2 years.

Kids often get taken for granted and we sometimes fail to acknowledge what a blessing they are. Someone once told me that I should work hard while my kid is young so I can spend time with him when he’s older and more understanding, after spending the last 9 months at home including 6 weeks of babysitting while the wife was studying, I disagree. The time you get with your kids is priceless whether they can understand it or not, even they’re too young to remember it, you always will and I am so grateful that I could spend so much time with him and could watch him grow and develop every day.

As he gets older, our responsibilities grow too and I pray that we always do what’s best for him. He has definitely been the coolness of my eyes and tonight I pray that he always is Insha Allah.

Perhaps one day when you’re older and you read your old man’s blog on some futuristic tech gadget… Know that I love you!

Allah, grant my little boy good health and a long, prosperous life, allows us to take care of him while he’s young and let him take care of us when we’re old!

Ameen!

Our new routine ;)

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

I can’t believe 6 weeks went by so fast. I have changed nappies, brushed teeth, changed clothes, made breakfast & lunch, worked around a day time sleep routine and watched a few too many episodes of Play School. Six weeks ago I embraced my new routine and my new role as a part-time house husband. Today is the last day of my new routine and from tomorrow I’ll have a newer one Insha Allah.

Despite being an awesome dad and having some of the most amazing times with my son, I’m looking forward to our new routine and having mummy home from tomorrow. I have learnt to work efficiently while having to see to the kid so I plan to work even more efficiently with the wife’s help so we can spend more quality time together. When you don’t have a structured routine or timeline, productivity usually suffers and you end up working longer than necessary. After having to work around a toddler’s sleep routine, I’m confident I can work smarter and will do my best to avoid any after hour/bed-time/weekend work.

Since I did such a good job, I think I might continue and give the wife a hand with some of the chores too, especially looking after the little boy. We’ve shared some awesome experiences and I have learnt so much. Despite a few challenges along the way, I think it was a success and a new routine is always exciting.

A shout-out to my wife on a job well done too, she’s been an excellent student, teacher, mum and wife and took good care off us even with her busy schedule. Love you and I look forward to having you home from tomorrow Insha Allah.

 

Super Dad!