…4 years married!

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

What a way to start the year… my son turned 2 on the 1st of January and the 2nd was our 4th wedding anniversary. I guess the fact that we have a 2-year-old son forces us to believe that we’ve been married for more than 2 years but it definitely doesn’t feel that way. It really feels like it was just the other day. So much has happened, so much has changed in these 4 years but there’s 1 thing that hasn’t… our marriage. Four year’s later and despite occasionally taking things for granted and being a bit cranky, I still feel like I did then. Grey hairs have sprouted and body weight has fluctuated but inside, I still feel for my wife what I felt that day 4 years ago.

With each day comes greater challenges and bigger responsibilities but the realisation that our marriage stands so strong 4 years on is soothing and certainly reassuring. Marriage is so easily taken for granted and it’s so easy to neglect the person we wake up beside each morning, I’m thankful for these reminders that often wake you up to the many blessings you have around you.

I’d like to use this milestone to change a few old habits and make sure that my wife and our marriage are both given as much attention as they should and a little bit more. Love, affection and romance are not reserved for newly weds or special occasions and should be celebrated everyday. If I fail or come short for some reason, I hope this post will remind me and keep me on track.

The Prophet Muhammad (S.A.W) said: “The believer with the most complete faith is the one with the best character, and the best of them are those who treat their wives the best.”

… Insha Allah!

2012 closing…

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

 

Alhamdulillah, I am grateful for seeing the end of another year. Every day is a blessing from Allah whether you live by the Lunar or Gregorian Calendar or whether you ‘celebrate’ New Years or not.

After a few hectic weeks, we took a few days off to spend some family time together and celebrate our son’s 2nd birthday as well as our 4th wedding anniversary. These dates or milestones really put things into perspective and are sometimes good reminders about the things we take for granted. I could not believe my son was already 2 and the next day I couldn’t fathom being married for such a long time. The change in routine was good and gave me an opportunity to reflect on 2 of the most important people in my life. Some may call it celebration but I like to think of it as an appreciation for my son who just turned 2 and my wife who’s been with me for the last 4 years. I probably feel the same way every year but I can not believe how fast 2012 went by.

2012 was a big year, lots happened, so much changed and with the change came a few big challenges. My sister got married and moved to America, I quit my job in public practise, began working as a virtual business consultant and finally kicked-ff my online supplement business. Circumstances changed drastically with my dad’s illness and I guess things haven’t quite gotten back to normal since then. I haven’t yet had the strength to write about some of the things I learnt and felt during this challenging time but perhaps I might, Insha Allah.

With so much uncertainty and so much going on at home, time just flew by I’m glad I was able to stop and take a break for a few days to appreciate the blessings in my life. There are many things I wish I had done, so much that was done and as always a few regrets. My aim is to do the things I wish I had done, appreciate the things I did accomplish and work on reducing the regrets Insha Allah.

2012 closes, our holiday was the perfect transition into the new year and now… 2013! Alhamdulillah!

 

 

 

New Years Eve in Melbourne…

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

We were out on the streets of Melbourne on New Years Eve hoping to soak up some of the atmosphere and make the best of the first day of our holiday. It wasn’t dark yet but the crowds were closing in, I saw a few weird costumes, lots of inappropriately dressed people and an endless supply of drunken idiots. Decided to save ourselves from the crowds and the drunken environment so we retired to our apartment and decided to have a quiet night in to kick off the new year.

The drunken party culture never fails to amaze me, we witness it throughout the year and I always wonder… If it weren’t for Islam, would we be out there too? I’d like to think that we are innately good and that our moral compass would have steered us away from such activities but we won’t know for sure. It makes me so grateful and proud to be a Muslim. I pray that we are always rightly guided Insha Allah.

Ameen.

2012 Solar Eclipse…

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

I was joking with my wife earlier tonight about waking up early tomorrow morning so we could witness the solar eclipse, we realised that we didn’t get any protective eyewear so we’d in fact be waking up early to not look at the solar eclipse which was kinda funny. Nevertheless, with the hype and media coverage this evening, we got talking and she reminded me of the eclipse prayer and asked if there was anyone offering in congregation. I haven’t heard of any mosques offering the prayer in congregation but I remember reading about it a little while back so I decided to do some research and put together a few notes on how to offer the prayer.

The prayer itself is described in the following Hadith:

Narrated `Aisha: In the lifetime of Allah’s Apostle (p.b.u.h) the sun eclipsed, so he led the people in prayer, and stood up and performed a long Qiyam, then bowed for a long while. He stood up again and performed a long Qiyam but this time the period of standing was shorter than the first. He bowed again for a long time but shorter than the first one, then he prostrated and prolonged the prostration. He did the same in the second rak`a as he did in the first and then finished the prayer; by then the sun (eclipse) had cleared. He delivered the Khutba (sermon) and after praising and glorifying Allah he said, “The sun and the moon are two signs against the signs of Allah; they do not eclipse on the death or life of anyone. So when you see the eclipse, remember Allah and say Takbir, pray and give Sadaqa.” Bukhari, 2.154.

The Hadith explains the actual prayer which I have summarised below but it also clarifies the fact that solar and lunar eclipses have nothing to do with deaths, births or other events so we should avoid superstition and rather fear Allah at these times and invoke prayer. Allah’s signs are found throughout nature and though science may provide a logical explanation of these events, as believers, we acknowledge the Almighty and bear witness to His signs. While the sight itself is quite amazing, why not take advantage of the occasion by following a sunnah of our beloved Prophet (p.b.u.h) and performing Dhikr (remembrance) of Allah.

Here is a summary of the prayer, also known as Salaat-ul-Kusoof:

  1. Stand up for prayer as normal
  2. Recite Qur’an as normal
  3. Perform a prolonged Ruku (Bow) with Dua/Supplication
  4. Stand up and recite Qur’an again
  5. Perform a 2nd prolonged Ruku (Bow) but not as long as the first one
  6. Stand up and then proceed into Sujood (prostration) and prolong the Sujood with Dua/Supplication
  7. Sit up straight as you normally would between prostrations
  8. Go back into sujood again and prolong it but not as long as the first prostration
  9. Repeat the above steps for the second rakaat or second unit of prayer

 

The Eclipse can be viewed over Queensland (QLD) tomorrow morning 14 November 2012 from approximately 5:44 AM to 7:44 AM. May Allah accept our prayers and guide us towards the straight path.

 

“Therefore remember Me. I will remember you. Be grateful to Me and never show Me ingratitude” – Al-Baqarah 2:152

 

 

 

Melbourne Cup Reflections…

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Growing up I was oblivious to the Melbourne Cup festivities, right through uni too, I heard about the race that supposedly stopped the nation but I couldn’t be bothered to even take note of some of the things that go on. I remember my first Melbourne Cup day in the office, everyone was excited about dressing up, getting drunk and betting on horses with the most unusual names. I spent the day before the races turning down various sweeps and betting syndicates and had to explain to everyone why I didn’t have an interest in gambling or the idea of heading to the pub for the races.

I was the only Muslim in the office so this was new to many of my colleagues but everyone was understanding. I requested to be excused from the afternoon lunch at the pub and my manager was very accommodating so while the rest of the office got drunk and lost all the money they played on the races, I stayed back and had a quiet afternoon in the office. This took place towards the end of my first year in public practice and despite being excused from the actual drinks and gambling that afternoon, I recall feeling very uncomfortable in the office and began noticing how different I was from everyone else.

By this time, the euphoria was wearing off and I began noticing a few changes taking place that I wasn’t very happy with so I remember questioning whether this was the right work place for me. Fast forward a few months and my prayers were answered, I received a job offer from a smaller firm up the road that turned out to be alcohol free, gambling free and pork free. My new manager was mormon and my new colleague was a fellow Muslim brother I knew from an Islamic camp a few years before.

The new office was awesome, didn’t have to deal with the office drinks, drunken parties, gambling or dirty talk. All the food was halal, afternoon drinks were replaced with afternoon tea and office parties were replaced by jet skiing, mini golf and gelato overlooking the beach. Halal food, halal entertainment, a boardroom for our prayers and a 2 hour lunch break for Jumuah… Perfect. My first Melbourne Cup day in the new office was actually quite enjoyable, no one cared about the races, not a beer in sight and instead off drinks at the pub, the manager treated us to a little lunch and dessert which was a good change in routine.

I spent 2 Melbourne Cups at the new office which was quite enjoyable and comfortable… lots has changed since then and by the next Melbourne Cup I found myself working from home completely oblivious to the hustle and bustle of the corporate world. I am so grateful for the way things turned out. After working in public practise for 3 and half years, despite a very Muslim friendly work place in my last job, the freedom and luxury of working from home and working for yourself is absolutely amazing. The challenge now is maintaining an Islamic working environment while having complete flexibility and control of my own working conditions. It’s easy to complain about restrictions and limitations when you work for someone else, the real test is whether or not you can fulfil your duties, both religious and professional when you have control of your time and workload.

I hope and pray that my new boss allows my faith to flourish beyond the restrictions and limitations of the corporate lifestyle. Looking forward to many more Melbourne Cup Days in my virtual office away from the drinking and gambling. While I am grateful for my experience, I also pray that anyone out there subjected to less than the ideal working environment be granted the strength to maintain their faith and prosper in their line of work.

A blue Thursday

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

It’s 11:30 AM on a blue Thursday morning, as I lay in bed with my 21 month old son, I can’t help but remember what blue, rainy mornings were like in the office.

Rainy days on the coast made it difficult to get out of bed and were the cause of many off my ‘sick days’ at work. I used to look out the window and wish I could be at home in bed, maybe watch a movie or 2 or 3 😉

Now that I’m home, these memories make the experience even more enjoyable… If you actually remember them that is. It’s so easy to get stuck into a new routine, you sometimes just forget about your old ones and neglect to appreciate the change.

Make the best of your time and appreciate the little things that happen. By being aware of the things we wish for and sometimes ask for, we can reflect on our circumstances and actually see that our prayers have been answered. Sometimes we’re just too busy to acknowledge the blessings before our eyes.

Had an awesome blue Thursday and I’m grateful for the changes in my routine! Alhamdulillah!

A new routine…

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Today was the first day of my new routine and my new job as a (part-time) house-husband. The Mrs is doing her 6 week practical experience program for her teaching degree so I’m on babysitting duty from 7 AM to 3 PM everyday.

First day went well, productivity was high, had some good bonding time with my little man and I must admit, the satisfaction and pride I felt at the end of the day made all the poop nappies worthwhile. I am pumped about my new routine and I hope everyday is as good as today.

Despite my initial reluctance in accepting my role as a house-husband for the next 6 weeks, I feel a sense of achievement in my acknowledgement and enthusiasm for this new experience. I’m not sure if it’s a masculinity thing, an ethnic one or perhaps a cultural issue but for some reason, my initial reaction was the fear of being labelled a house-husband. I can’t explain it but my instinct was to justify the situation in the most masculine way possible to avoid anyone assuming I’m some sort of stay-at-home dad.

CHALLENGE ACCEPTED! I decided not to justify it but to embrace it, break tradition, or culture or whatever it was that resulted in my initial reaction and be the best house-husband (in the most masculine way possible) for the next 6 weeks.

Man is naturally forgetful and instinctively ungrateful. We always want change, always something different. A few months back I would have killed to have 6 weeks at home with my son. I hated leaving home every morning and weekends were never long enough. I used to fantasize about the things I would do if I worked from home and if I had more control over where I was and where I had to be. Fast forward a few months and the dream became a reality, after quitting the office routine and working from the best place ever for the last 6 months, it was so easy to forget those fantasies.

My little reflection gave me a new perspective on things and I’ve been looking forward to my new routine. Day 1 went well and I look forward to tomorrow Insha Allah. I can’t take credit for a full-time house-husband since my amazing wife still takes care of the cooking, cleaning and all the prep that goes into being a housewife/mother/student/teacher/food blogger 😉

While some dads have to be part-time fathers due to their work requirements, I get to be a full-time father for the next 6 weeks… and that is all the justification I need!

Perhaps this is the inspiration I’ve been seeking… Insha Allah I’ll be able to learn, remind and reflect through my writing again!

Between Ramadhan’s

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

 

I just spent a few minutes reading my own Ramadhan Reminders from last year and I can’t believe how much has changed. Alhamdulillah I am grateful for everything that I have and I trust in the way things are meant to be, but when you actually take the time to look back and reflect… it’s quite amazing.

Last Ramadhan feels like yesterday, yet so much has changed, so much has happened since then. Really puts things into perspective. I feel humbled by the lack of control yet pleased with the outcome.

When I started writing a few years back I hoped that my writing would firstly serve as a reminder to myself and then to anyone who can benefit from it. Now I know what I meant! Looking back at last years posts has truly served as a reminder and I’m hoping to take some of my own advice.

 

Blessed Ramadhan!

Friday morning…

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

As I took out the trash this morning I was reminded of a little story … The Prophet Muhammad (S.A.W) was seen by one of his companions while taking out the trash.  His companion was alarmed and said to the Prophet: Oh Messenger of God, you are taking out the trash!  The Prophet replied: who should I have take out the trash, the mother of the believers?

Following the Sunnah is really not that difficult… Blessed Jumuah!

Reflection: Less racing, more winning!

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

I realized today that I sometimes get carried away with certain obsessions at the expense of things more rewarding and fulfilling in life. It must be a human thing because it feels natural and you often notice it in other people. I guess the wisdom lies in the realization of these obsessions and the ability to recognize and alter the way you do things.

For the past few months I’ve been obsessed with my fitness and as a result, I now hold 2 concurrent gym memberships. I’m sure I’ll make good use of them but in hindsight, it may not have been the brightest idea. Reflecting on my actions I’ve realized that by obsessing over it, my expectations where higher and it became more difficult to achieve what I was set out to achieve.

That’s not what I regret though, what I regret are the things I missed out on.

As my passion for the obsession fizzled, I stopped chasing it so much and have found my priorities re-aligned with the more important things in life. As soon as my focus shifted, my priorities changed, I felt more fulfilled and despite not frequenting the gym as often… I’m fitter than ever … And I have more time for my family!

Alhamdulillah!