Ramadan with my wife and kids… (Especially for my wife)

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

As much as we plan for Ramadan and despite the immense Barakah and Blessing in the month itself, our hectic lives and complicated lifestyles always make Ramadan a busy time in the household. With a toddler and a new born, this Ramadan was always going to be a challenge but as I reflect on the month passed, I think we did alright. This post is dedicated to the person who worked day and night to ensure the Ramadan Family Machine was well oiled and maintained.

From the pre Ramadan planning, meal planning and food preparations right up to the kids Ramadan activities, dealing with my hectic routine and taking care of the Eid Gifts… when you really think about it, Ramadan also serves as a reminder of the blessings we have throughout the year that we take for granted… the wives, the mothers, the facilitators of Ramadan.

This year, my wife (and fellow blogger) had the task of not only managing the entire household but also to create the ideal Ramadan environment for our children and in particular, our 3 & a half year old son. It required a valiant effort from the both of us but looking back right now, I believe it was well worth it and definitely well accomplished.

She cooked our food, made me oats for Suhoor every day, cared for the kids, I even saw her feeding both kids at the same time while I had my afternoon nap after work one day. ‘Super-Mum’ comes to mind when I think about it in retrospect. Cooking and cleaning aside, its the ‘Kids Ramadan’ that really impressed me, both as a husband and a father.

Even before Ramadan began, we had a Ramadan Advent Calendar on the wall detailing our ‘Ramadan Activities’ for each day. These included arts & craft, reciting Quran, learning Surah’s and even making binoculars for our Moon-sighting adventures. The activities may seem simple but the impact they had on our son was truly amazing.

The advent calendar gave him something to look forward to each day and the awareness of Ramadan encouraged him to help out around the house. The Ramadan consciousness instilled in him through these activities eventually gave him the courage to attempt fasting and also accompany me to Taraweeh at the Musjid.

I can not describe the joy of having a toddler insist on going to the mosque for Iftar and Taraweeh, I believe the Ramadan environment facilitated by my wife’s ingenious ideas played a big role in achieving this and for that I am grateful.

Despite not watching any tv for the entire month (Zaky Videos were the exception), the kids we entertained through-out the day and there was never a dull moment in the house, Alhamdulillah.

After reflecting  on the past month with my wife and kids, I am reminded of one of the teachings of Islam and this has given me a greater appreciation for the wisdom behind this teaching…

 The first right of the child over the father is to choose a righteous wife in order to be a righteous mother.

May Allah reward her and increase her! I pray that this Ramadan has been a fruitful month for everyone and that Allah shower his Mercy and Blessings on the Wives, Mothers and caretakers of this Ummah In Sha Allah.

For anyone who doesn’t already know, my blog is married to the the blog, Modest Munchies so check out some of my wife’s savvy tips and ideas for the kitchen and the family there.

Eid Mubarak!

Islamic Edutainment… My thoughts on ‘Zaky & Friends’

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

With Eid around the corner, I’ve noticed a number of ads for the Zaky & Friends Series of Videos and I thought I’d share my thoughts on these.

Zaky Range of Movies

I remember buying one of the ‘Zaky Movies’ for my little sister a few years ago. As a teenager (at the time), I didn’t care much about the movie itself but I thought it would be a nice gift for my baby sister. My sister was known for her endless questioning and so I was bombarded with questions about the movies which gave me some insight into how a child might absorb such stories.

Fast forward a few years and my little sis gave me these very movies for my son who was only a year old at the time but I decided to hang on to them and keep them safe for him. As he grew older and took a keener interest in the colours eminating from the tv screen, we began watching some of these movies with him and would often use them to keep him occupied while we were busy.

As first time parents we were concerned about some of the effects television and movies could have on our son and found comfort in re-running these movies from time to time as a little distraction for him. He watched the movies over and over for several months and eventually tired of them and asked us not to put any ‘Zaky Movies’ on for him. I must admit, at this point I had memorised the scripts and soundtracks of all the movies so I didn’t mind the change up.

By 2 years of age he had tasted the sweetness of television and started watching ABC for Kids. We were very mindful of his television habits and kept a close eye on the content. In my 12 weeks as a stay at home dad, I found a number of supposedly children’s television shows to be completely inappropriate for kids and with the help of my wife was able to filter through the tv guide and only allow him to watch a select few shows that we were comfortable with.

A few months passed by and though he was enjoying watching Sesame Street and one of my favourites, Fireman Sam, he began asking questions about some of the stories he had learnt in the Zaky videos. I was amazed at this since he hadn’t watched any of the movies in a while and you usually don’t expect a toddler to retain such information for such a long time. Nevertheless, I enjoyed our little conversations and to be honest, it was an amazing feeling as a parent.

His questions and curiosity got us back into the movies, I bought the entire set and for Eid that year, we got him the accessories and toys to go with the movies.

His favourite movie was Story Time 2: The story of Prophet Abraham (Ibrahim) which I watched with him a few more times so I could correctly address his questions and concerns. It was only then that I realised the power of these movies and the extent of their impact on a child’s mind. The questions he was asking related to matters of Faith including the concept of God and Good vs Evil which can sometimes get tricky when you’re dealing with a toddler. By taking the time to answer hes questions, unbeknownst to us, we had given him what I believe is the best Madrassah lesson you could possibly give a 2 and a half year old kid.

While the concept of God, particularly as The Creator was something he was already familiar with, the movie gave him an understanding of God as The Care-taker, The Protector, The Loving and Powerful as evidenced in the story of Prophet Ibrahim. He grasped the idea of idol worship being contrary to God’s teachings which also gave him a foundation for the criteria of what is right and what is wrong. He was also able to understand the concept of Prophethood and related it back to God.

The incident of the Fire in the story of Prophet Ibrahim introduced him to the power of God over all things as well as the concept of miracles. He even acknowledged the existence of the Angels which was something I was slightly concerned about due to the complexities of the unseen world.

I didn’t realise that he had understood and absorbed so much of this story until a few months later when I began reading the series of kids books titled ‘Stories of the Prophets’ to him.While I had prepared myself for the questions that might have ensued, to my astonishment, he had a firm understanding of the core concepts which facilitated his understanding and appreciation of the stories of all the Prophets – This is when I truly appreciated and understood the value of these movies.

I’ve also seen kids watch some of these videos without benefitting at all from them so it’s important not to force it on to young kids and to ensure you have the time and patience to address their questions and concerns. Parents should be watching these videos with their kids so it becomes more than just entertainment. I believe this applies to all types of entertainment, if you’re comfortable exposing your kids to something, the least you can do is expose yourself to it so you know exactly what your child is being subjected to.

The Zaky and Friends brand has grown substantially over the last few years and as a Muslim Parent in Australia, I am proud of their success and grateful for their efforts. May Allah increase them, I look forward to many more videos In Sha Allah and I’m hoping my daughter also enjoys their works.

The DVD’s and merchandise are available on the One4Kids website as well as a number of other Online Stores. Click here for a preview of Story Time 2: The story of Prophet Abraham (Ibrahim)

In the words of Merril J Fernando… ‘Do Try It’ 😉 – Your kids will thank you one day!

I hope many more kids can benefit from these videos In Sha Allah!

Assalaamu Alaikum!

Date thy neighbour…

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

My wife and I have been planning to share some Sunnah inspired treats with the neighbours since we moved into our new neighbourhood a few months ago. Between unpacking and having a baby, we didn’t get down to doing it. Perhaps it was better to wait…

Caring for, sharing with and doing good unto neighbours is a big part of our tradition and also a great social obligation in Islam. There could be no better an opportunity to revive this Sunnah than the month of Ramadan… the month of sharing.

Some of the benefits of Dating your neighbours:

  • Most importantly it is a Sunnah of Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) and a form of charity – “Save yourself from hellfire by giving even half a date-fruit in charity.” – Sahih Al-Bukhari, Volume 2, Hadith 498
  • Emphasises the significance of both sharing and neighbourliness in Islam
  • Encourages kids to be generous and teaches good etiquette towards neighbours
  • Increased awareness of Islam and Ramadan in particular
  • It is a great form of Da’wah and propagation of our beautiful faith
  • A good ice-breaker for new neighbours or people new to your area
  • It can be a good Ramadan Activity if you get the kids involved
  • Facilitates better relations with neighbours

A simple act that could have lasting effects, not to mention the satisfaction and fulfilment from doing something good for the sake of Allah.

Sharing with Muslim neighbours is as easy as delivering a plate of goodies but with non-Muslim neighbours it’s important to share as much information as possible. Here is the note we sent out with our treats:

“Ramadan is a special month of the year for over 1.8 Billion Muslims throughout the world. It is a time for inner reflection, contemplation, discipline and devotion to God. As we fast and sacrifice food and drink during the daylight hours, we are reminded of those who are less fortunate than us and we are encouraged to be charitable. Ramadan is a month of giving and sharing… Dates are a big part of Ramadan and the Islamic tradition, we’d like to share this delicious and nutritious fruit with you today”.

My wife put together these Cream Cheese filled Date treats and a Free Printable Template which is available here. For more Ramadan treats, kids activities and your very own Ramadan Meal planner, check out Modest Munchies.

May the Blessings of Ramadan be with you.

Ramadan Prep… Clearing up the clutter once again!

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Ramadan 2014 is fast approaching and with only a few weeks to go, it’s time to re-visit a few Lifestyle Optimisation Strategies. Clear up the clutter now so you can take advantage of every opportunity during the month of Ramadan.

  • Make up previous year’s missed fasts / Pay Fidyah, etc. depending on your circumstances
  • Take advantage of fasting during the month of Sha’ban
  • Recite Quran – if possible, complete your current recitation and begin a new one in the month of Ramadan
  • Get a good sleep cycle going so you can handle waking up for Suhoor/Sehri
  • Go easy on socialising and social media so you can avoid unnecessary talk/chat, etc – something I need to work on this In Sha Allah.
  • Limit the amount of Entertainment/Television/Gaming, etc
  • Plan your meals early – Ramadan is not just about food but since we need to eat and drink, plan your menu in advance and make all necessary preparations so you don’t waste time in the kitchen. My wife’s in charge of this department and I’m sure she’ll be sharing some of her Ramadan recipes on ModestMunchies.com
  • Shop now – get your shopping done early, stock up on groceries and your Eid clothes too so you’re not frequenting the shops when you can be benefiting from  the virtue of this auspicious month.
It’s been a year since the last Ramadan, take this opportunity to get back into the zone so you don’t waste valuable time trying to find your feet. Prepare early, prepare well and get ready for the month of Mercy.

Over the years I’ve observed how Ramadan preparation changes with our circumstances. Ramadan as a child with my family, then as a teenager, as a husband with my wife, as a new father, last year with a toddler, this year with my 4 month old daughter…Alhamdulillah.

Circumstances often change but the yearning for Allah’s mercy remains and continues to grow. This is also from the blessings of Ramadan.

May Allah extend our lives so we may witness the month of Ramadan In Sha Allah.

The wedding verse… 30:21

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

I came across one of my favourite verses today… it brings back memories of my wedding day and pretty much every other wedding since. Perhaps if married couples remembered and actually reflected on this beyond their weddings, we wouldn’t have so many broken homes… #JustSaying

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And among His Signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that ye may dwell in tranquillity with them, and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts): verily in that are Signs for those who reflect. – Surah Ar-Rum, Verse 21. 

It sounds romantic and looks good on wedding cards, but in order to truly benefit from it, we must remember and reflect In Sha Allah.

May Allah make our spouses the coolness of our eyes!

Ameen!

Sweet reflections!

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Despite reciting these verses repeatedly, they never fail to amaze me… SubhanAllah!

And behold! Your Lord has inspired the bee with this “Build thy hive in the mountains, trees and in the creepers over trellises: then drink nectar from every kind of fruit, and follow the ways made smooth by the Lord.” From its belly comes out a fluid of varying hues wherein is healing for mankind. Here is indeed a Sign for those people who ponder over it. – Quran, An Nahl v 68-69.

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It takes the entire lives of 12 bees to make 1 teaspoon of honey… We can not begin to fathom the mercy of our Lord.

Reflect and Appreciate!

Alhamdulillah!

Birthday fasts…

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

It is the month of Birthdays and as my birthday approached, I reflected on the following Hadith which came to mind:

Abu Qatada Ansari (Allah be pleased with him) reported that Allah’s Massenger (may peace be upon him) was asked about fasting on Monday, whereupon he said: It is (the day) when I was born and revelation was sent down to me.

After pondering over this, I decided that I would follow this Sunnah and begin fasting on my birthday. I figured it would be fitting to do this on my Islamic Birthday rather than the Gregorian equivalent.

Just as I was about to ‘Google’ my Islamic birth date, I remembered… I was born in the month of Ramadan!

Alhamdulillah!

3 Reflections… One of my favourite Ayaat.

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

I reached one of my favourite Ayaat today which brought back many memories. These Ayaat brought tears to my eyes in my youth, made me proud in adulthood and gives me hope in parenthood.

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SubhanAllah, the same words repeated, a different message each time!

I pray to have many more reflections on these Ayaat In Sha Allah!

Productivity through television…

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

After over indulging over the Easter long weekend, we subconsciously undertook a little detox this week and haven’t watched any television since then.

This is what I did instead:

  • Increased recitation of Quran
  • Learning and reflecting on the Seerah of Prophet Muhammad (PBUH)
  • Working out with the wife – Keeping fit
  • Quality time with the family
  • Bed before 10 PM

And thats just 4 days. Best detox yet!

We often complain about a shortage of time, if you want to taste the Barakah, turn the tv off. Without the television you have no choice but to be productive.

Alhamdulillah.

The Eclipse Prayer… BloodMoon 2014

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

My wife reminded me of tonight’s Lunar Eclipse this afternoon so I decided to dig up an old post about the eclipse prayer or Salaat-ul-Kusoof.

The prayer itself is described in the following Hadith:

Narrated `Aisha: In the lifetime of Allah’s Apostle (p.b.u.h) the sun eclipsed, so he led the people in prayer, and stood up and performed a long Qiyam, then bowed for a long while. He stood up again and performed a long Qiyam but this time the period of standing was shorter than the first. He bowed again for a long time but shorter than the first one, then he prostrated and prolonged the prostration. He did the same in the second rak`a as he did in the first and then finished the prayer; by then the sun (eclipse) had cleared. He delivered the Khutba (sermon) and after praising and glorifying Allah he said, “The sun and the moon are two signs against the signs of Allah; they do not eclipse on the death or life of anyone. So when you see the eclipse, remember Allah and say Takbir, pray and give Sadaqa.” Bukhari, 2.154.

The Hadith explains the actual prayer which I have summarised below but it also clarifies the fact that solar and lunar eclipses have nothing to do with deaths, births or other events so we should avoid superstition and rather fear Allah at these times and invoke prayer. Allah’s signs are found throughout nature and though science may provide a logical explanation of these events, as believers, we acknowledge the Almighty and bear witness to His signs. While the sight itself is quite amazing, why not take advantage of the occasion by following a sunnah of our beloved Prophet (p.b.u.h) and performing Dhikr (remembrance) of Allah.

Here is a summary of the prayer, also known as Salaat-ul-Kusoof:

  1. Stand up for prayer as normal
  2. Recite Qur’an as normal
  3. Perform a prolonged Ruku (Bow) with Dua/Supplication
  4. Stand up and recite Qur’an again
  5. Perform a 2nd prolonged Ruku (Bow) but not as long as the first one
  6. Stand up and then proceed into Sujood (prostration) and prolong the Sujood with Dua/Supplication
  7. Sit up straight as you normally would between prostrations
  8. Go back into sujood again and prolong it but not as long as the first prostration
  9. Repeat the above steps for the second Raka’at or second unit of prayer

The moon rises at 5:27 PM over Brisbane tonight with the eclipse ending at 7:33 PM. Observe and pray In Sha Allah.